Dear Diary, Why Do Narcissists Hate Boundaries and the Truth?

Dear Diary,

I’ve tried to make sense of it all — why narcissists despise boundaries, why they recoil from the truth like it’s poison, and why they can’t seem to give me the space and respect I need. But every time I think I’m close to understanding, they do something that twists the situation, leaving me questioning everything again. It’s like being caught in a storm, and no matter how strong I try to stand, they find a way to knock me down. Why do they make everything about them? And why is it that, when I reach out for support, I end up feeling more attacked than before?

Boundaries, I’ve learned, are the kryptonite of a narcissist. To them, boundaries are a threat because they’re all about control. When you set a boundary, you’re saying, “This is where I end and you begin. This is my space, my line, and you cannot cross it.” But to a narcissist, boundaries are a direct challenge to their power. It’s a reminder that they don’t own you, that you are an individual with your own needs, desires, and limits. And that’s precisely why they hate it.

Narcissists can’t stand the idea of not being in control. Boundaries are a reminder that they don’t have the absolute power they crave, and they’ll do anything to tear those walls down. They’ll push, they’ll test, and they’ll try to manipulate you into letting your guard down. They’ll call you selfish, unreasonable, or accuse you of not caring enough, all to make you question your right to have limits in the first place. Because to them, your boundaries are an obstacle standing in the way of their influence over you.

And as for the truth? Well, to a narcissist, the truth is the greatest threat of all. The truth exposes them for who they really are — for all their manipulation, deceit, and control tactics. The truth is something they can’t control, can’t twist to their advantage. It’s a light shining on their darkest secrets, and they can’t stand the thought of being exposed. So they’ll fight it tooth and nail, using every tactic they know to keep the truth hidden, even if it means rewriting reality itself.

They’ll deny, deflect, and project their issues onto you until you’re left feeling like the one at fault. They’ll attack your character, question your motives, and spin the…